Life and Pets

A heartache …

R.I.P. Prin


I haven’t said much about it, but my little black cat was suffering from a persistent skin infection. Every day for many weeks, I’ve had to administer pills, and she was so patient. I applied ointment daily. Long ago, the lesions were cultured and I was following the recommended course of treatment. I didn’t care about the hundreds of dollars; I just wanted Prin to get better.

Today she was worse, and although Prin didn’t seem to suffer other debility, the spots were unsightly and the infection possibly contagious. How long could I risk infection myself, or keep her confined, or risk transmission to other pets? This has been on my mind daily all this time; we had “cured” the same condition once last year, but it had returned.

I felt defeated, worried, and guilty. Dr. Vogel had said that if the infection seemed to be bothering the cat, we could have put a “cone” on her. I thought, “What would be worse than having itchy spots? Not being able to scratch.”.

So that is it. My beautiful kitty purred while I put her in the travel kennel, mewed sweetly while I drove, and purred while I held her and the vet administered the lethal shots. OMG… I felt guiltier than if she had fought us, but thank goodness I didn’t have that extra trauma.

What do you believe? That she can rest or play with the pets that have gone before? I haven’t always made the best decisions for animals; am I going to have to face the ones that were euthanized because I wouldn’t spend money for treatment, or were “extra” in some way, or they were unpredictable and I didn’t have time to train them? How much suffering on their parts justifies me taking their lives?

Every day on Facebook, I see memes about the “Rainbow Bridge”, a concept which purports that there is a glorious heaven for all pets. It’s a beautiful concept, but with that comes my fear that I will eventually atone.

I have a friend who made me coffee this afternoon when I stopped on the way home from Dr. Vogel’s. With coffee, we had a bit of Baileys … actually a juice glass each, and a little more. I wasn’t finished crying over Prin, but that helped me a great deal, and we talked about many things.

Soon after that, Gary came home from his trip to Winnipeg! Yippee! Nothing reinforces my appreciation of his company and all that he does around this place as much as any length of time without him. Gary took this road trip with his daughter Beth, who expecting a baby in August. (We are wildly happy and excited!)


That’s about all I have to say tonight. I wanted to share about Prin. Nancy, Judy, and some other treasured friends would understand and not want me to feel guilty: thank you for always being there for me and for reading my Blog.

Love, Ann

7 thoughts on “A heartache …

  1. Oh Ann – so sorry about Prin. Dont feel so bad. Prin had been suffering and would have continued to suffer, since her infection does not sound like it was getting better. Our pets are so precious to us but at some point we have to consider what quality of life they will have. I still cry over my Angel sometimes when I think about her, like just now when I read about Prin. We are better for having these animals love us unconditionally. Have a good cry for now, but you will smile fondly when you think of her in the times to come.

      • Oh Ann so sorry for your loss please do not feel guilty in anyway your Prin is without pain and suffering because you are a responsible pet lover. Your heart hurts with the decisions you have made for the benefit of your pet family, it is only natural. I look at my little old cat that we have raised from birth she will be 20 years old in August, she appears to be healthy enough but suffers dementia. Quite unsettling to see her sit and press her nose on a cabinet door for lengthy periods of time, she has only travelled once to the vets to be spayed and is far to anxious to ever travel again. I know I owe her the respect not to cause her anymore stress if it can be avoided. Although she sleeps ever so much she still rides herd on our clouder and indeed our pack ……. do not fear my friend you will be greeted with unconditional love when we meet our friends that have past before us …… hugs Donna

  2. Ann, I am so sorry about your beloved Prin.
    I feel that our best friends are here with us in whatever capacity so that we may grow as humans. They bring us lessons for us to learn from. Some are as easy as loving them. Others are more difficult.the decisions that we make affect them. Are we doing the right thing?
    In your heart you know that you did the right thing. Prin would have continued to itch and scratch and get more infections.
    I truly believe that our best friends will meet us some later day in the future. Not to make us feel guilty. But just to be with us.
    There will be such a crowd around you that the human types will have to wait a good while to get to be with you. What a wonderful experience to look forward to!
    Grieve for Prin and others. Knowing that you have always done what needed to be done with a kind and loving heart.

  3. Ann. So sorry for your loss. I know what you are feeling. I had to let my Vanilla go a month ago. I had her for 16 years but her kidneys were failing and I didn’t want to let her suffer but it was such a hard decision to make. I had her cremated so she is still with us. Shea misses her terribly also. rip Prin and Vanilla. Our pets are part of our family and leave paw prints on our hearts.

  4. Sad to hear about Prin, Good little kitties always leave paw prints on your heart. Ann, you did what a loving responsible cat mom had to do. Very brave of you to go alone with her, it is a difficult time, as I sit here crying too. I too hang onto the “rainbow bridge”…how could we not? . Glad to hear Gary is home…exciting to have a new life to love ❤

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